The Bay

I know I have been away a lot lately. I have had a lot of personal things come up in the last couple of weeks that took priority over the blog site. I failed on the 31 In 31, I know and I have been lacking in film reviews. For all that, I apologize. Hopefully soon things for me will return to some semblance of normalcy, and I will do my best to keep the reviews coming.

Enough about me, though. I am here with a new review!

Today brings the film, Chicken Shit... wait, I mean it's called The Bay. Barry Levinson, a director who is very, VERY hit and miss with me decides his career has reached its lowest and thrown his hat into the cliched "found footage" genre.

Taking place in the fictional town or Claridge, Maryland on July 4, 2009, mutated isopods from a large chicken processing plant (hence the Chicken Shit mentioning) begin infecting fish and the local residents. As the day progresses: locals, doctors and the CDC attempt to find out the cause of these mutated isopods and a way to stop the outbreak.

The film is told from the present day, 2012, by news reporter Donna Thompson (Kether Donohue) who was in Claridge on that fateful day to document the 4th of July festivities. She continuously pops up and speaks with an unseen person asking her questions. She states that all the footage from that day was suppressed, but is now available and shown to the audience.

What follows are various forms of video documentation from TV cameras, surveillance, police dash cams and more. We see various stories regarding locals who are becoming infected and making their way to the hospital. A doctor at the hospital, when not working on the infected, speaks on SKYPE chat with the CDC in an attempt to find out what is causing this infection. During the day, we also follow Donna and her cameraman around as they go from documenting the joyful festival to the many corpses that fill the town by day's end.

Barry Levinson does an adequate job of showing multiple points of view and keeping the storytelling very streamlined. The plot is very straightforward regarding the initial findings of what is causing the infection to the very final moments. As this is supposedly shot as a "found footage" film, the occasional usage of a musical score to showcase the type of emotion for the scene does not seem to fit. Especially if the film is structured as a composition of what occurred that day by Donna.

Beyond the musical score, which I feel there should have been none, another quibble I have is regarding character motivations. This is typical when it comes to this type of film, but why not drop the camera and help? Besides that, there is a subplot involving a family on a boat that is on their way to Claridge. Once they arrive on the island and assess the scene, why would they continue onward instead of staying on the boat? I know we are in the third act and the story can't just be spent hiding in a boat, but it just doesn't ring true.

Along with the family on the boat, one character appears to be infected by getting blood on them and then using water to try and rinse the blood off. It feels like we are going to be waiting for something to happen with that, but this character never gets infected and their story continues onward without any further mention.

Which then leads me to the end. As someone near and dear to me likes to mention, this film feels like it suffers from a Deus ex machina. We do not see a resolution to the infection, but we are told what happens. The way it is delivered feels like they had no way to end the film and just decided to come up with the one in the final film.

This is a mixed bag of a film, but on the whole, I did enjoy it more than not. Besides a third act that seems to wrap up everything too quick in a neat little package, this is a solid "found footage" film that utilizes a more grounded suspense style to it instead of cheap shocks and over the top gore.

And for Barry Levinson, this is better than Sphere. So, you know, there's that.

6.3/10

31 In 31: Tales From The Hood

What would a review of Halloween films be without a Tales From The Crypt rip-off?

What we have here are four stories with a wrap-around segment. As I did with my prior review about V/H/S I will review each story separately.

Welcome to my Mortuary

The wrap-around segment consists of three stereotypical gang members who arrive at a local funeral home looking for "shit". What is "the shit"? It's never explained, though one can assume drugs. If it is drugs, why not just say that? I mean if some stereotypical gang members come up asking me about "shit" I'd be dead cause I have no idea what they are talking about. Whatever this "shit" is, the gang members know that the "shit" is in the funeral home and want it badly. Unfortunately, the funeral owner Mr. Simms (Clarence Williams III) is very eccentric and decides to tell them spooky tales first while the gang members fumble around the place. Eventually, the final story ties into the three gang members' story and it is revealed in predictable fashion that they are dead, Mr. Simms is Satan and no one gets any "shit". Sorry.

Rogue Cop Revelation

What an awful title for this segment. Anyway, four stereotypical white cops who also happen to be racists... yeah, I was shocked too, led by Newton (Michael Massee) along with a new cop who is black, Clarence Smith (Anthony Griffith) and is not racist... again, I was shocked, all arrive at a routine traffic stop of black politician, Martin Moorehouse (Tom Wright). The stop does not go as planned and the cops kill the politician, plant drugs on him and send him into the water. One year later, Clarence is no longer a cop, an alcoholic and suffers from guilt. All the cops, with Clarence, gather at the grave of Martin who is then resurrected. Martin exacts his revenge on the four, white cops then berates Clarence for not doing anything to stop his death. Martin then makes it appear that Clarence killed everyone. Nothing new and very, very predictable. Fin.

Boys Do Get Bruised

Writer and Director Rusty Cundieff stars as Richard Garvy, a sensitive teacher to Walter (Brandon Hammond) who, on a daily basis, sports new bruises on his body. Walter continuously mentions being tormented by a monster, who Richard brings up to his mother Sissy (Paula Jai Parker) and her boyfriend Carl (David Alan Grier). I am not a David Alan Grier fan, but his, albeit, brief performance in this story steals the show. His role is dark and frightening and pulled off very well. Considering the types of horror stories in this film, this is probably the best as for the most part, the horror of this film is really grounded.

KKK Comeuppance

Alright, the corny segments return with Corbin Bernsen playing Duke Metger: stereotypical Southern, racist senator. Duke resides in a former plantation which Black and Jewish persons protest on a daily basis. Duke has a large painting of a voodoo witch on one of his walls. After the death of his image maker, dolls of the witch appear and attempt to extract revenge on the racist Duke. Corbin Bernsen hams it up as his anger against the revenge-seeking dolls becomes more violent. This is one of the more predictable stories of the bunch and the only entertainment of this film is the cheese ball factor. Nothing special here.

Hard-Core Convert

Stereotypical gang member Crazy K (Lamont Bentley) attempts to kill and old rival. Instead he is almost killed by three stereotypical gang members (I wonder who they are?). After recovering, Crazy K is serving life in prison when he is visited by Dr. Cushing (Rosalind Cash) who transfers him to a separate facility. Here, Crazy K is put in place with a crazy white supremacist (Not Corbin Bernsen) then placed into a sensory deprivation chamber where all the persons he has killed haunt him. Dr. Cushing offers him a chance to forgive and save his soul. Crazy K defies her with his arrogance and it is revealed that these are his final moments on the street after being shot. A decent attempt at a morality tale.

Overall, this is a mixed bag of a film that worked better when I was younger and didn't know better. As it is, there is a decent mood and about two stories are worth watching and a really good performance from David Alan Grier. If you can get past the annoying wrap around where gang members supposedly use about four words in their entire vocabulary, you might find yourself a decent horror anthology. Unfortunately, an attempt could have been made to not be so stereotypical regarding just about every character in the film. This could have been better, but certainly could have been worse. Just don't expect the reinvention of the wheel.

31 In 31: Killer Klowns From Outer Space

Is it a comedy or a horror film? A good mix of both.

In 1988, The Chiodo Brothers wrote and directed what is now considered a cult classic. The film tells the tale of a small town that has to band together to fight a race of aliens that resemble clowns. The aliens capture humans inside cotton candy-shaped cocoons and harvest them by drinking their blood.

Beyond that, the film is filled with great make up effects and a nice sense of dark humor. Just about every cliche about clowns that you can think of is thrown into this film. From the aforementioned cotton candy cocoons to a circus tent space ship to balloon animals. All those gags are here and used to (somewhat) gruesome effect for a PG-13 film.

The humans are your stereotypical bunch including the town lovebirds who stumble upon the clowns. You got the local sheriff and the police officer who does not believe a word about these homicidal clowns. You even have an ice cream truck driver. All the wacky characters and stock archetypes of a cheesy b-movie film are here.

The standouts in the film, though, are the clowns and their accessories used within the film. The designs of the clowns themselves are impressive, especially considering the low budget of the film. This film is a perfect type  of a fun, low budget horror film. Even with the shoddy acting, this film has plenty of charm. The tone of the film straddles goofy comedy and obscure horror.

The Chiodo Brothers make a loving, low budget film that never feels forced. With an interesting idea and some great practical effects, this is a really fun film that needs to keep finding more of an audience.

V/H/S

It's been a while since I have put up a review for a recent film. This is what happens when Summer ends and the holiday season has yet to begin. A new film has finally graced my eyes, but it is not something I wish to have to sit through again. The piece of celluloid that entered my life has a name. And its name is V/H/S.

As this is an anthology film, I will review each segment within the film. The grade I give will be a total for the overall film.

Tape 56:

The story which opens and serves as the wraparound for the entire V/H/S film, follows a group criminals who are hired to retrieve a video tape from a house. The criminals will make a good amount of money and have to find a specific tape (the lead criminal says: "they'll know it when they see it"). During their time in the house, they find a dead man, yet don't really seem fazed by it and actually decide to individually sit in the same room with said dead man and watch various VHS tapes. Each individual begins to disappear until the leader is left. The wraparound then ends abruptly before the final segment begins. A really uninteresting story with uninteresting characters that make dumb moves. Not a great way to begin your anthology.

Amateur Night:

Possibly my least favorite story in V/H/S. 3 douchebag guys go out looking for women to sleep with. One woman acts somewhat strange, yet they bring her along with another female to their motel room for drinks, sex and debauchery. Of course, the strange woman harbors a secret and the three men find out what that is very quickly. Literally within 3 minutes of this story beginning, I already could figure out what was going to happen. The story played out as predictable as it seemed. With the exception of an interesting final shot, this film fell flat on its predictable face. Nothing new whatsoever brought to the table on this one.

Second Honeymoon:

A much more interesting story can be found with 'Second Honeymoon'. A married couple goes to the west and enjoys their time together when the wife, Stephanie, receives a fortune mentioning a loved one. That night a mysterious woman asks the husband, Sam, for a ride (a scene which is completely omitted from the film) which he denies, but is spooked by her presence. Afterwards, a mysterious figure begins entering the motel room and using their camera to spy Sam and Stephanie. This entry starts strong, which some great scenery and decent performances. Unfortunately, as with most of the stories, the ending fails what was built up to be a solid suspense story.

Tuesday the 17th:

A stab (pun definitely intended) at 80's slasher films. 4 friends go out into the woods where a killer might be lurking and waiting for them. With the exception of the killer (his abilities and him/itself, which really isn't explained) this is a very formulaic tale, much like Amateur Night. There really isn't much to say as this follows your standard "killer in the woods" story. Bland, boring and predictable.


The Sick Thing That Happened to Emily When She Was Younger:

An interesting idea, about a man and woman chatting through Skype, wherein one person thinks their apartment is haunted. Emily contacts her boyfriend James about noises she hears in her apartment. Through their Skype conversations, supposed apparitions begin to show up. Emily is unsure what to make of the supposed apparitions while James tries to be the comforting voice. An unusual twist by one of the characters gives this an interesting idea, but again this fails to stick the ending. What drags this one down is the forced dialogue to explain what the hell is going on. Overall, this is decent but an imperfect ending keeps this from being recommended more highly.

10/31/98:

The final story brings us a haunted house tale. 4 friends go to a house for a Halloween party but find more than they bargained for. The friends find the house empty except for brief appearances of a ghostly presence. They hear noises in the attic and find something they did not expect. V/H/S ends strongly with 10/31/98. Once the 4 friends discover what is happening, some strong visuals begin to take over the story. I was thoroughly impressed with this story through and through. Solid performances and a ramped-up sense of dread fills this story with a sense of job well done.

Overall, with high expectations put onto this film, I was really let down. All of the stories suffer by having to be about 25 minutes in length. The stories are not strong enough to be condensed into short vignettes. Some of the ideas would work better as a feature-length film while others are weak and could have probably been edited out completely.

2.9/10